The Life Improvement List: Closeup

You may've noticed that I call my wishlist my "Life Improvement List" because it is. There's no jewelry, shoes, handbags, or lingerie on that list. Of course I love some of those things and will never turn down a shopping trip or gift cards. I'm a feminine woman who likes nice things, including those dried flower arrangements, even though they’re useless.

What I list are meaningful additions to my life, or things I plan on buying when I can. My choices are an investment in my future. It's harder than you might think to make a list of tangible items to fill such a list. My Amazon list is half high-minded, and half little things I'd like to have but aren't completely life-impacting.

Wishtender Marigold makes this easy: you pay for the wish, I get the funds and fulfill the wish. There's no surprise element for either of us, but neither are awkward logistics. It's very simple on your end, and there's no way you can get me something I don't like or in the wrong color.

Once an item is off my list, it's off. Some items are evergreen (like subscriptions or food), others are very much one-time purchases. Investments in my life, as claimed. Right now, the items on there are tangible; I cover a few experiential ones here.

Let's take a short tour, shall we?

Inez Louis/Ilsensual is a well-known industry photographer who recently moved to Atlanta. She creates lush photos and a shoot with her would be a luxury, indeed. My photos need updating and while I could rent a local space and use the self-timer, a professional is a professional for a reason. (I've not learned how to be a selfie queen and probably never will.)

Laser resurfacing my face? A little Botox? A bit of filler here and there to create some balance and give my lips a little more oomph? I have a little bit of vanity and there are some procedures that will help with sun damage and genes inherited from my non-celebrity mother.

My estimate of $4000 is probably conservative (depending on a variety of factors), though the results will be satisfying to both of us. The doctor I've used in Raleigh does subtle work. I don't wish to look blobby or plastic, just…better. Improved, not completely new and different. Feel free to ask if you really want to offer improvement (as opposed to makeover). In the meantime, of course, skincare matters!

But by far, the most important item to me right now is getting a good portrait lens for my camera. If there was a crowd-funding option I'd do that. It's my one true need because I'm having to rely on autofocus more and more. (Lasik and/or contacts are not an option for me.) The lens will change how many photos I miss due to soft focus. I've rented the lens before so I know exactly what it provides and how reliable it is (far more reliable me eye-balling the focus, I can tell you that). B&H gift cards can also take care of it.

Which leads me to the other photo items on the list: the other range of lenses, camera-body upgrade, a high-quality printer so I can print my own photos using proper paper and inks. The printer is probably my second major photography desire because I want and need to be able to accurately proof my work, though I don't expect it to replace using professional labs. So maybe the camera-body upgrade should be second?

A girl can dream, right? And dream on her all-natural, cruelty-free mattress. As someone who suffers insomnia and sleeps hot, having one of the most comfortable sleeping surfaces possible is sure to help.

I expect the list to shrink over time. There are fewer material things I want as I get older. Building my own business is not something I can put on a list for purchase, though you can support that building quite a bit by the things listed here, or covering memberships or software (not listed).

I might add Pilates classes on here at some point, not truly a material thing but something which I love when it's in my life and miss it when it's not (like now).

If you're brave enough to want to do Pilates classes with me — private instruction for two people at a studio — let me know and I can send you links to you the two Richmond studios I recommend (one is linked above). I think that would be a great way to get to know each other: challenging, sweaty, with a real workout for both of us. (A shower and meal is recommended after. It’s will be a hard 55 minutes.) Not a traditional companionship option, but I find a hard, physical challenge to raise my mood, even as it raises my demand for carbs after.

At any rate, my heart's desires are now explained. A little.

This is why designer clothing doesn't make the cut: it's not a desire of the heart. Such things are merely nice to have but don't move me. They're not a need to be able to move into the world I want to live in.